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17 March 2007

We Bequeath to you...

My Dad called me the other day and told me he and my Mom were updating their wills. Nothing has changed, of course. They're leaving everything to me and my older sister. But it hadn't been updated since 1984-85. That's a long ass time, considering I was entering high school at the time. Some of my Dad's assets include two classic cars: a 1928 (I think) Cadillac and a 1933 Ford. The Ford is complete (although it took him 5 years to build. From scratch) and he's starting on the Cadi, he told me, next month. Since he was able to get a hold of me first, he gave me dibs on the cars.

I took the Ford. You can see why I chose it by clicking HERE.

There's also the house, whatever cars they have at the time, my Mom's jewelry, some cash, a timeshare, art...and whatever else they've amassed in their 40 odd years of marriage. We won't have to worry about how or where to bury them because that's all been taken care of. Their plots have been paid off. They'll be buried in the same cemetery where my Gramma (my mother's mother) was laid to rest, but in the military section.

"So, they're gonna play 'Taps' and everything?" I asked him.

"Yep," he said.

I'm not looking forward to that.

"This is probably a crazy thing to say, but I really hope you two go together," I told him.

He didn't think I was crazy.

"Your mother and I were talking about that the other day and we said the same thing," he said.

I told my hubby what I said and he gave me the classic "Why the hell would you say that for?" look.

Well, let me tell you. Unlike other children out there, my sister and I have a great relationship with our parents. We love hanging out with them. Every time we get together there's always loud, uproarious laughter. So loud, I'm sure the neighbors can hear it. I think I'm the luckiest woman in the world because, compared to my other friends, I have the greatest parents in all the universe.

And through the years, there have been several close calls with my father. The first time was his minor heart attack at the age of 48. I think I was still in high school at the time and it scared the shit out of me. That's when I started thinking "What's going to happen to me and my sister if we lose them?"

My Dad is 63 now. And a prostate cancer survivor.

My sister and I are grown up now. We've gotten married. She has kids and Hell will freeze over-twice--before I ever go down that road. Our family is no stranger to death. I've lost both grandparents (my mother's parents), a grandmother (my father's mother), a cousin, an uncle...I no longer worry what's going to happen to my sister and I because we have special people in our lives that will help us pick up the pieces once they're gone.

Yes, it would be devastating--crippling, really--if they died together. But that's the point. They'd be together.

The grieving process would be so much easier for the ones left behind. We could grieve for both of them instead of just one. I can be such an emotional basketcase sometimes, I don't think I'd be able to handle just one death and then have to go through it again when the other one passed.

It hasn't even happened yet and even as I sit here typing this, tears begin to form and my throat closes up.

I don't like to think about death. Especially the ones of family and close friends. I dwell on my reaction too much. Will I sob hysterically or not at all? Will I scream in pain and lock myself in our room or suck it up and put on a brave face? Will I be able to get up at the service and say a few words or hope that others will do it for me? I really don't know what will happen, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

For when they die, it won't be the material things they bequeath to me that will have any importance.

It'll be everything else.


posted by GeminiWisdom @ 4:38 PM |


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